Dr. Darcy Smith on femme vs. butch | GO Magazine

Dr. Darcy:

I’m a femme and in the morning informed that I look ‘straight’, whatever it means. When I check-out lesbian taverns i will be ignored as ‘bi-curious’ and/or ‘friend-of-a-lesbian’ girl. I’ve two questions:

1) really does becoming a lesbian mean that i have to butch my self upwards in order to be given serious attention?

2) Are there any other women who are into style, cool restaurants, and who’re in essence stylish New Yorkers, for whom becoming gay is not their unique entire identification?

You are not alone!

I have had this question presented if you ask me continuously. It is not easy staying in a community and experience undetectable, but changing your appearance shouldn’t have to become solution. I am not stating I never had a Brittany second in which We questioned the significance of long-hair, the need for another set of Manolos, and potential modification shedding both will have back at my experience with this community. However, as I’ve said before, the way to change a stereotype is not through conformity. The feminist action was actually designed to give us choices, not limit them.

Having said that, It’s my opinion there are more lesbian and bisexual ladies who have an array of interests including patronizing the “webpage Six” establishments and paying obscene quantities of money to sit down according to the tents of Fashion Week. As a resident brand-new Yorker, my recommendation should try looking in this extremely magazine for the club-like sites, and that is for which you will undoubtedly discover femmes in numbers!

Meanwhile, buy for yourself a season of

The L Keyword

, throw on that facial mask that you never have time for, and relish the validation your characters make available to many of those that femme with the key. In order to end up being secure, dispose off the buzzer for those who have one, the very least you find yourself in a weak time.

Email concerns to dr.darcysmith@gmail.com or contact 212-604-0144*

*By distributing concerns, the writer acknowledges that she’s no liberties of privacy and therefore her question of an adaptation thereof can be published in GO mag.  Correspondence between Dr. Darcy Smith and a writer does not constitute a therapeutic relationship and this type of a relationship therefore the rights/privileges associated with such could only end up being founded through a scheduled, personally period.